SARATOGA SPRINGS—Hundreds of Skidmore students congregated on the campus green this Saturday for the school’s annual “Fun Day.”  The so-called “fun” activities that the student body engaged in included smoking on marijuana cigarettes, chugging on alcohol beers, and exposing their naked bodies.

There were no consequences.

After hearing about this blatant disregard of indecent exposure laws, several Saratoga residents expressed outrage.

“This is a disgrace,” said Saratoga resident Martin Patterson.  “Nudity is illegal.  These kids think that they can do whatever they want and get away with it.  They have no idea how tough it’s going to be in the real world, where taking off all of your clothes can result in getting fired from your job or ejected from your son’s little league game.”

Other residents called for action from the Saratoga Police Department, which was warned about the potential nudity, but stood idly by.

“What a joke,” said Saratoga resident Shirley Stewart.  “It’s against the rules to be naked on Main Street but in the Skidmore green anything goes.  The next time one of my children gets in trouble for getting naked in his second grade classroom  I’m going to remind them of this double standard they set.”

“These laws are in place for a reason,” said Saratoga resident John Borstein.  “They’re to protect the children.  Not that there are any children on the Skidmore campus.  Actually, I heard there were some children operating the bouncy castle.  Why weren’t they being protected?”

Borstein added, “This is conclusive proof that one hundred per cent of the nudity in the Saratoga area comes from the Skidmore campus.”

Skidmore sophomore Andrew Cantor, who is news editor of the student newspaper, witnessed some of the “Fun Day” nudity.

He did not endorse it.

“For a school with such a rich academic history, it’s disappointing to see,” Cantor said.  “Nudity is something that happens, but it should be confined to certain places, such as the shower, or—holy shit, look at that girl’s boobies!”