
Tonight, SEC will host its bi-yearly blowout bash, building the basketball court into a bangin’ ballroom.
Rotgut refreshments will realize risky ramifications in the rusty reminiscences of the evening.
(You know what I mean?)
Please:
1) Avoid putting vodka in a water bottle. This will prevent drama from developing later in the evening.
2) Don’t steal anything without permission. You may be drunk, but the police probably won’t be.
3) Don’t be a loner. Cover your boner.
4) When it rains, it pours. It’s going to be slippery out there tonight. One wrong move, and you may fall on your ass.
Cheers, and consider the anniversary of the First Battle of Saratoga.