Lucy’s Cafe Not Exactly The Best Thing Ever

Written by Executive Editor on February 28th, 2011

womp womp womp

As the more studious few of you may have noticed Lucy’s, the new library coffee shop, opened this weekend (and it sucks.)

You see, coffee from Lucy’s is made on a Keurig single-serving machine and Keurigs brew single cups of coffee using single K-Cups that, reprehensible environmental waste aside, aren’t that delicious, or economical, or good.

BUT WAIT THERE IS MORE: One Keurig K-Cup brews about 8oz of watery coffee and will set you back $1.25. A delicious small at Burgess (Black Magic Espresso Roast duh) will also pull $1.25 from you pocket but, at 12oz, you’re getting 4 more ounces of delicious, warm liquid brains for your money.

$1.25/8oz = 15.6 cents per ounce of coffee
$1.25/12ox = 10.4 cents per ounce of coffee

Not to get all nit-picky here but HOW IS THIS REAL? Supply and Demand! Invisible Hands! Free Markets! Exchange Rates! Credit Backed Securities! Economics Of Scale! Does the college not understand these things?

You’re probably thinking, “Executive Editor, stop making a big a stupid big deal over 4 oz, you’re being nit-picky and don’t seem to understand any economic terms” which I guess is a good point if you are dumb and don’t care how you spend your valuable dollar twenty five.

I hate to give everyone a reason to hate on Lucy’s because I think a Library Café is a great idea. I love coffee, I love muffins, and I love flirting with the people who prepare these things for me but Lucy’s gives me a headache so bad that I need another cup of coffee.


2 Comments so far ↓

  1. poop says:

    yumm, watery balls! ps LOVE YA!

  2. mmhm says:


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